"The cycle is too big for her...."

"𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘤𝘺𝘤𝘭𝘦 𝘪𝘴 𝘵𝘰𝘰 𝘣𝘪𝘨 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘩𝘦𝘳..."

is what I always said, everytime 𝐬𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐚𝐢𝐥𝐞𝐝.

Her grandpa had gifted her a bicycle on her birthday. For the first year, she cycled with the support wheels. Then I figured she would never learn unless she tried without them. So a year back, I detached them & tried to train her without them. After several days of trying, I saw 𝐬𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐟𝐚𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 & so I gave up, thinking the cycle was too big for her.

We did not use the cycle for a few months. Then again we tried for a few days, but again 𝐬𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐚𝐢𝐥𝐞𝐝. "𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘤𝘺𝘤𝘭𝘦 𝘪𝘴 𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘵𝘰𝘰 𝘣𝘪𝘨 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘩𝘦𝘳" I told myself, & again, for the next few months,the only thing that occupied the cycle seat was dust. 

Last Monday, I egged her on to try again. I took it to the local shop to inflate the deflated tyres. Her feet still didn't reach the ground in entirety when she sat on the seat. "𝘓𝘦𝘵𝘴 𝘨𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 1 𝘮𝘰𝘯𝘵𝘩" I told her. "𝘐𝘵 𝘵𝘢𝘬𝘦𝘴 𝘢 𝘭𝘰𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘯 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘯𝘦𝘸, 𝘴𝘰 𝘭𝘦𝘵𝘴 𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘪𝘯 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘯𝘦𝘹𝘵 30 𝘥𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘥𝘢𝘪𝘭𝘺 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘮𝘢𝘺𝘣𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦" I added. She nodded in agreement & we found an empty lane.

As always, the experience was a testing one for her & me. I kept telling her where she was going wrong & she kept giving reasons. 20 mins in & I saw she was able to manage independently for just about 2-3 secs, falling a few times thereafter, suffering a few bruises as 𝐬𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐚𝐢𝐥𝐞𝐝 to maintain her balance. I kept giving feedback to help her understand what she had to do & that is when she said "𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘵𝘢𝘭𝘬 𝘐 𝘢𝘮 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘢𝘣𝘭𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘧𝘰𝘤𝘶𝘴 𝘰𝘯 𝘤𝘺𝘤𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨". "𝘑𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘢𝘯 𝘦𝘹𝘤𝘶𝘴𝘦" I thought, but I decided to keep mum for the next few mins. All she took was 5 more mins to start cycling on her own. I was astonished. It was fascinating to see her achieve something in a matter of mins for which I had budgeted a month. She practised for a few more mins before we came back home, sweaty & happy.

Learnings:

- We all need support wheels when we start something new, but ultimately, the real learning only starts once the wheels are taken away. We might have to suffer a few bruises in the process.

- It wasn't she who was failing everytime over the months. 𝐈𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐈 𝐰𝐡𝐨 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐟𝐚𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐢𝐧 𝐡𝐞𝐫. Perhaps she would have learned earlier, had I tried a bit harder.

- The task often seems 𝐛𝐢𝐠, but maybe that is an excuse we give ourselves for our failure to put in what is required. Sometimes a perceived 𝐛𝐢𝐠 task also needs 𝐛𝐢𝐠 effort & 𝐛𝐢𝐠 patience.

- Pep talk & constant feedback is essential. However, it is important to realize 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐩 talking & allow the trainee to internalize the feedback & focus on the task.

Finally, this week, 𝐈 𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐩𝐩𝐞𝐝 𝐟𝐚𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 at my goal and 𝘀𝗵𝗲 𝘀𝘂𝗰𝗰𝗲𝗲𝗱𝗲𝗱 in achieving her goal.