"...thanks babes..."

 "...thanks babes..."

...replied a mommy to my message.

Since my daughter started schooling, I took up more responsibility for her studies & school. Not because the wife doesn't want to - she is equally invested. It is mainly because I am more keen on it. Getting homework done & submitted is one of my self-set weekly KRAs.

My daughter was 5 in 2020, so our Sr Kg & 1st were online. It was a boon for me. I was more involved because:

1. I am a bit of an obsessed techie so I ensured we had the device, backup device, wifi & backup wifi always ready.

2. The wife had to go to work for the most part of the pandemic, whereas #MarshIndia being the colleague friendly firm it is, had remote working till about a few months back. Now we work hybrid (office few days a week).

The parents formed whatsapp groups. One was a dads group (all divisions) & then each division had a moms group. All the talk in mom's group was only about the class related updates & rightly so. At the risk of getting kicked out of the daddies group - it is largely a quiet group, only used for forwards once every few days. So I asked my wife to get me added to the mom's group. It saved my wife from acting like a postman, relaying messages from the group to me daily. 

I was amazed by the way the mommies were managing it. Timely & accurate information sharing, assistance offered to each other & the discipline was superb. However, often some queries would start with "Hi gals/mommies/ladies" which obviously was a bit awkward for me, though I understood they may not be aware there is a dad in the group. There were times when there were queries starting with "Hi girls" & I had the answer to it, but I held back because I felt out of place & felt the others might freak out to see a "man" talking in mommies group.

However, I soon put that behind me & started participating. Once, a mom asked a query which I addressed. She replied "Thanks Babes". I started grinning, unsure of how to respond to it. I typed "Hi, this is a dad here" but ended up deleting it and ended up saying "You are welcome".

On this Father's day, I request all mothers to be more inclusive. There will be some dads in your mommies school group because the dad has their child's best interest at heart or because of some other personal challenges. You will see many fathers dropping or picking the child. Please do not judge the father or the mother. While nothing can replace moms ( can't compete with Gods), some of us fathers try to enter territories that still seem like "mom territory" in the interest of the kid's wellbeing or to help the wife. After all, parenting is 50-50 responsibilities, but besides giving birth and nursing the child (which so far, id biologically not possible), we dads can try and help with everything else.

Happy Father's day to all the wonderful dads out there who don't look at parenting as a task, but an honour.

Yours sincerely,

Not a babe, but a father to one.