"...kabhi kabhi aurat hi aurat ki dushman hoti hai..."

"...kabhi kabhi aurat hi aurat ki dushman hoti hai..."

...the lady said, fuming. ["At times, women are women's worst enemy]

It was around 2010. The firm I was working with was on a huge hiring spree, so they'd often organize walk-in interviews. Although I was never into recruitment, on one such occasion I was told to accompany the gang to a hotel where the walk-ins were scheduled. My job was to facilitate the operations of the drive.

For most part of the day, I was seated a few feet away from one lady (she was a senior manager) from our business side. Her department had won a mandate and she needed to hire 12 people to kick start the operations in the coming month. She and her colleague had come there hoping to close some of those open positions. After about an hour, a lady came in for the interview. She introduced herself and shared that she was staying close by with her husband. After some general questioning, the following happened :

"Any plans of having kids?" 

"Yes ma'm"

"In the near future?"

"Maybe, let's see"

"But it has been 4 years since you were married, surely you and your family might want one now?"

There was a moment of awkward silence. With some visible discomfort and in a low voice, the candidate replied "We have been trying for a long time ma'm, now it all depends on the Almighty"

This was followed up by some more discussion and after the lady walked out, the interviewer dropped her resume in the "Rejected" bucket. "Too much uncertainty around her family plans,'' she told her colleague.

Later in the day, another lady walked in. She sounded experienced and confident. 

"So how will you manage work with 2 little kids?"

"I will manage ma'm. My husband works the night shift. My mother also stays close by, so we will take her help as well."

"Won't you need a full-time nanny or a creche if you start working?"

"That's too expensive, so we will figure out a way once I get a job .''

Her resume also met the same dreaded bucket. "I know how difficult it is to work full time with 2 kids. She will not be able to manage" she declared, as the next candidate was called in. 

After about 15 min, I was a bit hungry. It had nothing to do with the fact that I had spotted beautiful curvy samosas stocked up at a farsan shop near the hotel. Having no intention of offending the samosas, I walked down to the shop, ordered a plate and sat down at one of the tables. That's when I heard a familiar voice say what I quoted above. When I turned to look, it was the same lady (mother of 2), talking on her phone. Pouring out her interview experience to someone at the other end, just as she poured a load of ketchup over the unsuspecting samosa on her plate.

Be it family/friends or interviewers/bosses/colleagues, unfortunately, such biases and stereotyping still linger around.