"...no, thank you. I am fit and in no rush, so I will stand in this queue,"

"...no, thank you. I am fit and in no rush, so I will stand in this queue," said the uncle, sporting a hat and a beard like Gandalf the White.

Last Monday, Mumbai went to the polls. I dreaded standing in an hour-long queue in the summer heat as I drove to the polling center. I collected the slip and entered the building to locate the polling room. There were about 15 people in the queue ahead of me.

A couple of minutes later, a gentleman joined the same queue. "Sir, you can come this side and stand in this queue. This one is for senior citizens," said the police officer stationed at the entrance. He was dripping in sweat in his khaki uniform and cap. That is when the uncle said what I quoted earlier. A few of us turned to look at the source of the voice. The uncle smiled, noticing the attention, and added, "I cycle across the country, and last year I cycled from Kanyakumari to Kashmir. I have relocated to Jharkhand but cycled down a couple of weeks ago to cast my vote since my name is registered here."

The guy standing next to him immediately asked how old he was. The uncle answered, "I am 70, but I still feel like 50. The day I feel like 60 is the day I will start standing in senior citizen queues. Besides, I have no urgency and nowhere to go, so I don't mind waiting in this queue." He then went on to narrate his cycling adventures. While talking about them, he said, "Paisa aur log aate jaate rehte hain. Accha khao, durust raho, khush raho, aaram se raho" [Money and people will keep coming and going. Eat well, stay fit, stay happy, stay calm].

The senior citizen queue only had four people, yet he waited in the general queue until his turn came. Interestingly, just a couple of days before, I had overheard someone in the office cafeteria say, "The VIP darshan queue moves quickly. It only costs a couple of hundred, but it saves so much time."

Here we had this gentleman who refused his right to a priority queue as a senior citizen, labeling it as a privilege. On the other hand, we often exercise our privileges without even realizing they are privileges, treating them as if they are our rights!

"...would you like some mewmosaas...?" asked the cat

"...would you like some mewmosaas...?" asked the cat in white fur on the screen, holding out a glass of milk, as V and I moved towards seats E6 and E7.

Yesterday afternoon around 2 PM, I was lying in bed after a heavy lunch, engrossed in doomscrolling, looking very much like Garfield after indulging in a few plates of lasagna. Suddenly, I felt my eyes shutting. I had a 3 PM meeting, so I decided to get some shut-eye for an hour. The next moment, I heard, "Papa! Papa!!". I opened my eyes to find my daughter, V, stooping over me. "It's 5 PM," she said calmly. "So what?" I asked, surprised since she never wakes me up. "It's 5 PM," she repeated. I was still lost. "Yeah. So?" I asked, a little confused. "We had to go to the movie," she said, concerned yet calm. I sprang out of bed like a man who had just spotted an inch-long spider.

I had booked two tickets to the new Garfield movie for a 5 PM show and had completely forgotten about it. Being a slave to technology, I rely heavily on reminders and alarms for almost everything in life. This time, I had forgotten to set a 3 PM alarm when I went to bed, which meant not only did I miss my 3 PM appointment, but I also overslept until the movie's start time! "Why didn't you wake me up a little earlier?" I questioned her. She didn't answer; she just looked at me with a sad face. "Let's rush now, get ready to leave," I told her. I dashed around the house like a roadrunner being chased by a coyote, making sure we were ready to move within the next 120 seconds.

Luckily, the movie was booked at a theater just a few hundred meters from my home. "We can walk there; it will take us 5 minutes," I had told V after booking the tickets earlier that morning. However, given the situation, a walk was a luxury we could no longer afford. We took the two-wheeler and reached the venue at 5:06 PM. 

"Sir, the parking is full. There is some repair work going on, so we have very little space for parking today," said the guy at the gate. "How can you not have space to squeeze in a two-wheeler?" I grumbled. He responded with a helpless smile. I knew I had only one option: to park outside on the road and hope it wasn't a No Parking zone. We parked the bike and rushed to security. I looked at my watch: 5:08 PM. 

"Tickets, please," asked the guard. I flicked my phone out and clicked on the ticket booking app. It did not load as quickly as I expected. "You guys really have a bad network here," I complained. Just then, the app opened, and we were let in. "Third floor, sir, go to the left," he said.

Noticing that the right side lift area was empty, we quickly ran towards it. We entered the hall at 5:10 PM, just in time to hear the mewmosa line. It was funny, and I knew what mimosas were thanks to a mimosa-guzzling friend of mine. But before I could smile at the joke, an usher asked, "Sir, where are your 3D glasses?" 

"You tell me!" I exclaimed. "Aren't you giving them out?" "No, sir, they were in a tray to your left when you entered," he explained. That's when I realized why we were told to go to the left. I felt like uttering a four-letter word but decided to keep it in my head. "V, go on and take your seat, I'll be right back," I told V as I ran down to get the 3D glasses. "You didn’t tell me to pick up the glasses!" I complained to the guy on the ground floor. "I did," he responded matter-of-factly. I grabbed a couple of glasses and hurried back to the movie.

Sitting in the cozy, air-conditioned hall with a tub of popcorn in hand, I had a moment of introspection. I realized how I had gone into flight-or-fight mode. None of this would have happened if I had set an alarm and left home on time. Instead of taking responsibility for my actions, I had been blaming everything and everyone around me for no fault of theirs.

"Did you like the movie, V? I'm sorry you had to miss 10 minutes of the beginning because of my mistake," I said, finally taking accountability, as we walked out of the hall.

Better late than never.

"...you are a criminal for doing this to all of us!! The Indian army should use you as a weapon!"

"...you are a criminal for doing this to all of us!! The Indian army should use you as a weapon!" Sir exclaimed, prompting laughter from the entire class.

It was sometime in the 5th or 6th grade, in the early 90s. We had a teacher who enjoyed mocking students. One fateful day, as he entered the classroom, he wrinkled his nose, indicating a foul smell. "Which one of you released this poisonous gas?" he inquired, scanning the class. Amidst the laughter, someone pointed to a student (let's call him Sameer), saying, "Sir, it's Sameer, its always him!" A few others joined in, and Sir, convinced by their accusations, directed some harsh words towards Sameer before beginning the lesson. 

A few days later, Sir made a similar face. This time, without any inquiry, he looked at Sameer and remarked, "Gassy, you are at it again, aren't you?" The class erupted in laughter as usual. From that day on, Sameer was known as "Gassy" in the class.

Thereafter, it became commonplace to witness Sir mocking Sameer. "Gassy, you're banned from entering my science lab; you'll cause an explosion there." "Gassy, why don't you sit on the last bench next to the window so we all don't die of suffocation?" He made many such derogatory remarks, some of which I can't mention here. This continued for months, perhaps even longer. Each time, the result was the same: the class would burst into laughter at Sir's punchlines. Sameer was a good-natured fellow who always took it in stride, smiling through it all, his cute dimples hiding the embarrassment each time.

Although we were all school kids, what made this socially acceptable was the fact that the teasing came from Sir. A teacher, whether liked or not, is always respected. So, regardless of their behavior, their words carry weight and are widely accepted, even if they shouldn't be.

As one grows older, there is always someone to look up to, whether at home, among friends, or at work. When someone you admire engages in casual banter, repeatedly putting someone or a team down, it risks influencing the minds of those around, especially juniors. The fact that these remarks come from a leader or influential figure makes them more acceptable than they should be.

If we look up to leaders, we need to be mindful of what we laugh at (accept and internalize). If we know people look up to us, we must be aware of the power our words hold in shaping opinions and biases.

A couple of years ago, someone in our school WhatsApp group shared a news link. It turned out that Sir was evading the law as he was charged with a criminal offense by one of his current students. The word used by Sir in poor taste had now boomeranged back. It was criminal to label Sameer as "Gassy," and perhaps all of us in the class owe Sameer an apology for our stinky behavior.